Well, I decided it would be easier to redirect people to my other blog instead of posting on two sites. Life in the Big mango has ended and life in the Peach has begun. The transition has gone well, though not complete. It will take time to feel normal. Right now I sort of feel like an alternate version of myself. I don't quite feel like me. So much of who I am was centered around being in Thailand for so long. I don't want to lose that but know I will have to learn to adapt to this life too. A part of me will always be in Thailand. If you want to continue keeping up with us, please read our blog at www.mommyscircus.blogspot.com .

We made it back to the States safe and sound. Our last few days in Thailand were busy, yet good overall. Being in the hotel room with 3 children prooved to be a little challenging and my middle child (2 years old) was fairly active! However he redeemed himself by being absolutely amazing on the plane. He sat patiently for almost the entire flight and only cried for maybe 5 minutes total. The other children did well too, but I wasn't all that concerned about them. Our team gave us a sweet farewell party and it was difficult to say goodbye to everyone. Even though it is a pleasure to be in the States, we are already feeling nostalgia for Thailand. We have enjoyed our time back and it has been fun to spend time with family and to go to the shops. We have enjoyed going to Target. We haven't indulged in any restaurants yet but we will! I hope to post some pics on here soon, but it may take a few days as we are knee deep in settling in. After all the weeks of packing, we are now unpacking. We are still suffering a little jet lag too. Stay tuned.

Tomorrow is our last full day in our house. The house is just about ready for the movers on Thursday. I have done about as much as I can at this point save a few things. We practically have our plane luggage packed and will just spent tomorrow doing all those last minute things in the house. Thursday the kids and I will head over to the hotel while Jack stays with the moving team. It will take two days to pack our house and then our stuff will go to storage. We are ready to be finished with all these preparatory days and just have a little bit of quiet as a family before we leave. These will be good days to help the kids get their heads round what is happening and help them prepare for the changes ahead. There are so many exciting things ahead for them like hotel stays, airplane rides, birthdays and family that we think they only process those things presently. We aren't sure if they understand the not returning part yet and if they do, what that will be like. I also want to say thanks for all the encouraging emails we are receiving from you out there. We look forward to reconnecting with you soon!

By now many of you are just learning of our future plans...if you are on our mailing list. We have finished our 4 year term here in Thailand and needed to make a decision regarding whether or not we would return for another 4 year term after our year in the States. We have decided as a family that the best thing for us as a family is to return to the States indefinately. We have loved our 6 years here in Thailand as 2 year missionaries and also as career missionaries for this 4 year term. We have had many amazing experiences, good times and bad times. We love our team, and we love Thailand. We just feel that we are being lead to move on to the States and to another form of work for Jack. My job stays the same. :)

We have exactly 6 days left here. We leave on July 29th at 1:30 A.M. We will settle in Peachtree City, Georgia with Jack's parents for about 6 months while Jack figures out the next steps. We are essentially starting over. We have no job leads, no housing of our own and basically nothing but our families to go home to! But this is another opportunity to see God lead and provide for us. If we've learned anything as missionaries, we've learned that God takes care of us always and in every situation. This one will be no different. We are scared and excited. It is hard to say goodbye here. We are leaving many people that we love. We are leaving a culture that we have assilmilated. We will bring some of those changes home with us.

Even though our lives will go from the ' big mango' to the 'big peach', I will continue to update this blog for a few more weeks. After that if you want to stay updated please see my other blog www.mommyscircus.blogspot.com .

Busy, Busy, Busy....

packing, sorting, dusting, throwing, giving, selling...
toys are dwindling, bored kids are unpacking things that must stay packed!

Baby must be nursed, cuddled, bathed and napped...
laundry must be washed and ironed, meals must be made with the remnants of our fridge and pantry...
Mommy is dreaming of a vacation by the sea!

Daddy has a million errands to run and loose ends to tie...
9 more days and we must say our goodbyes
and then...
Collapse!

Last night we had a Korean feast with our neighbors. My friend Bun is Thai and married to a Korean man. Twice a year we all gather together to eat a Korean meal in "Little Korea". There is a section of downtown where there are several Korean restaurants and other establishments all in one little mall area. We had a great time eating and fellowshipping with this family that has become so dear to us and has seen us through some of our more difficult times and have been a great source of support here in Thailand. We will miss them dearly.

Newborn boot camp should be winding up soon. We have almost reached the 6 week milestone which typically brings some more stabilty and confidence to the home. Last night, Jasper slept 6 hours through the night! There is light on the horizon. :) Sleep does wonderful things for new mothers and for any mother of little ones. Hopefully this is a new trend in our home.

We have been busy tying up loose ends as our 4 year term in Thailand comes to a close and we head back to the States. We have been preparing to move out of our home and have been busy with all the logistics of making an international move with 3 kids and a dog! It has been quite hectic doing this with a newborn. Ideally, I would have time to just be a new mother, but we will be leaving Thailand on July 29th...just 16 more days. This is also Gracyn's 6th birthday! She wanted to fly on her birthday. She will get to have her birthday for 48 hrs as we live the same day twice! We can have her actual celebration once we get to the States. We are excited about getting to see our family members. Some we haven't seen in almost 2 years and some we haven't seen in 4 years! It will be good for the kids to spend time with family as they really haven't been able to do much of that.

It has been a good 4 years and we are thankful for all the experiences...even the hard ones that caused us to cling to God even more. We saw a faithful God here and we are blessed. We are ready for a little pampering by family and time to rest and reflect on these past 4 years. Hopefully we can take a couple weeks rest before life carries us away on our next set of responsibilities. Please remember us as we fly on July 29th at 1:30 in the morning for 20 hrs with our children. Pray that the kids will adapt well to the States and that jet lag won't kill us!

I'm one month old!

Embassy trip(s)

Tuesday we made our way downtown to our Embassy. I walked into American services to fill out a passport application for Jasper. I filled it out quickly and we had a brief wait before our number was called to approach the window to speak with the staff. We thought we were doing pretty well. We asked to apply for a passport for the baby and the staff member said, "do you have an appointment?" Yikes! No, we did not make an appointment!! We had all our paperwork completed, sans marriage license on hand, but did not have an appointment. We hoped there would be grace for us, but to our dismay we would have to return on Wednesday to start all over again. After two babies and two passports, we neglected to think of making an appointment. So, on Wednesday we got the whole family back in the car and schlepped everyone back downtown for our appointment. This time we had everything in order. Jasper will be officially an American citizen in 3 weeks. He will hold a US Passport and have his certificate of citizenship. On Tuesday after our disappointment, we consoled ourselves with going to All Seasons Place (right next door) to eat at our favorite Chinese restaurant. At least we could do that. HOWEVER, the place closed down!!!! We weren't having a successful day at all. I really wanted to eat there and we were already drooling over the thought of some of our favorite dishes. I haven't been there in a year, but at least Tim Mills brought us take away from there several months back while on my bedrest. Little did Tim know that that would be our last meal from there. :( Such is life for businesses in Thailand...here today and gone tomorrow. Farewell Shianghai Din Xin..."long noodles" and scallion pancakes.

This is my new ride!

I'm 3 weeks old and loving my paci!

Jasper is 3 weeks old today! I hope to have some pictures of him at this week posted soon. First, I need to take them! Tomorrow, we will begin the process of applying for Jasper's passport and getting all his paperwork processed to confirm his American citizenship. Jasper is an American from the moment of his birth because we are, but we have to go through a whole rigamarole with the Embassy to secure a passport and get a certificate of citizenship. Thankfully, we've done this 2 times already and kind of know the drill. We have to take Jasper to the Embassy to prove he is a real person and Jack and I must also be present to prove we are his real parents. It is kind of a hassle, but at least we are Americans and can go straight to American services and not wait in the lines with all the other people. It's red, white and blue for you Jasper!

Jasper at two weeks old

Graduation Day

On June 7, 2007, Gracyn graduated from Kindergarten at International Community school here in Bangkok, Thailand.
Gracyn was voted "friendliest" in her class for superlatives. Mrs. Ann says she was popular and well-liked by all!
Gracyn and Mrs. Ann after graduation.
Gracyn and Miss Yo, the teacher's assistant

Gracyn had a great year inspite of her mommy being on bed rest for most of it. She is reading, writing and doing basic math skills. She has grown in maturity and responsibility. She's even lost 3 teeth this year! We are proud of her growth and accomplishments. Congratulations Gracyn...rising 1st grader!

Some Jasper pics

Mommy and Jasper ready to leave the hospital.

Jasper and Daddy

Jasper in his "going home" outfit...."I ain't happy right now".

Me and my big sis!

Here is Gracyn with baby Jasper at 8 days old! She is enjoying being a new big sister again.

He's Here!

Jasper Finlay was born on June 4th, 2007 at 6:59 A.M. He's 3.530 kilograms and 50 cms long. I am not sure what the conversion to lbs is on this but we think 7 lbs and 12 ozs. Jasper came into the world with a smooth delivery for both Mommy and baby! We are both doing well and trying to adjust to a new lifestyle. Jasper's name is means precious stone. Jasper is definately a precious stone to us. The Book of Revelations also mentions jasper several times. John refers to the face of God being as jasper and also the walls and foundations of heaven being made of jasper. Finlay is a Scottish name which means " little soldier". Jasper has been a little soldier throughout a difficult pregnancy and against some not so good odds. However, God is no respecter of odds! We are thrilled to have him finally here and we give God great praise and honor for this great gift! More pictures soon!

A no go

So the full moon theory is basically junk. The moon did not cause me to have anything different than I am already having. Last night my contractions did reappear at 1:26 A.M. and were coming every 10-15 minutes but were not strong. I laid awake for hours wondering if I would need to make wake up calls to half of Bangkok. We were having a large storm last night which is characteristic of this time of year. We had torrential rains, big lightening and peals of thunder. One big boom brought Gracyn to our room crying. Jack was trying to sleep and I was contracting but keeping it to myself. I didn't want to cause any alarm and wanted to allow even just a few more moments of sleep for those who could sleep. Finally at 3 A.M. I fell asleep and woke up in the morning without a baby by my side. I am starting to lose confidence in knowing what labor is. I do know it hurts a WHOLE lot worse than what I'm experiencing. I hope at least I'm making some progress so that my labor will not be a marathon. Hopefully this won't go on and on. I only have 4 days left to reach my due date. However, people are known to out last that date too! Sigh.

June Bug

It looks like we will have a June Bug after all. May ended yesterday with the baby still content to stay put. Actually, I had contractions all day yesterday and was convinced we would end up in labor and delivery by the end of the day. Instead 9:30 P.M. found me sleeping peacefully. My contractions were coming every 15-30 minutes all day long, but did not increase in intensity or time span. We stayed put at home and finished up a few last minute preparations. I thought I would perhaps have to wake Jack in the wee hours of the morning but the morning came without a baby. Today has been pretty calm with very few contractions. I could probably count them on one hand. Today doesn't seem like the day, but the irony of this story would be that it is! Isn't this supposed to be more predictable the 3rd time around? Each day feels like walking through a field of landmines. I keep waiting for the trigger to be tripped and am genuinely surprised to last another day. I think there is supposed to be a full moon tonight...don't those trigger labor?

39th week check-up

My check-up went well yesterday. I still had a slightly elevated blood pressure upon arrival but it settled back to the normal range within 15 minutes of resting. The fetal monitoring showed that baby is still doing well. Gracyn was with me this week for the monitoring as she had to see a doctor that morning as well. She was my contraction monitor. She didn't really want to sit still for 30 minutes during the monitoring so I gave her a job. She watched the " green numbers" which registered the intensity of contractions. Mine were mild, but Gracyn was excited any time the numbers rose over 20...which isn't anything to write home about. Now we continue the waiting game...will baby ever arrive?

Gracyn is still battling this cough she has had since Easter. Actually, Aidan and Jack are coughing as well. We decided to take all of them to the doctor...again...in hopes of ridding our lives of constant illnesses. Gracyn has been diagnosed with some kind of bronchial inflammation which requires her to use a steroid inhaler. She was unresponsive to antibiotics and our pediatrician felt an inhaler would help. If she is still coughing after two weeks of using the inhaler, she will see an allergist. I really don't suspect allergies as she began this coughing marathon on Easter day with a fever. I believe she just never really was able to get over the cough. Aidan is on his 3rd cough and cold in 2 months. He actually gets well, but then gets reinfected. Jack, the poor guy, is getting coughed on constantly by someone and well...gets sick. I'm ready to take up residence in a bubble and have become OCD about handwashing. Miraculously I'm still fine. Thanks for your prayers. We are trying to get everyone well before the baby arrives so that our little one can start his life in a healthy environment. Please pray to that end.

Stir crazy

Yes, I'm feeling a little stir crazy. I am still pregnant! Tomorrow I will have my 39th week check-up. I have never made it to 39 weeks before so I'm starting to feel abnormal here. My babies are supposed to be born in the 38th week...what's up? Technically, I still have 9 days to go and I should be more patient. Many women go to their due dates and even beyond. I have to remind myself that this is normal...but with each passing day I fear having an enormous baby. All that extra time gives the baby time to gain more weight! I guess this little guy is just too at home for the time being.

Week 38

Tomorrow I will be 38 weeks but I had my prenatal today. My fetal monitoring tests came back fine but I do have high blood pressure today. I started out with 138/83 and then after 30 minutes it was down to 125/something. I was checked once again back in the doctor's office and was back to 140/80 something. Dr. Sankiat didn't seem concerned. I had this happen with Aidan but he was born that night. I was tested for protein and that came back negative. So I don't know what to really think about all these results. Maybe I should just try to rest and hope my BP returns to the normal range. I'm getting a little antsy now and ready to have this baby.

Full Term

Today I am at full term! I have made it to 37 weeks of pregnancy. I'm really excited to be at the point where the baby is fully developed. 26 weeks ago, this felt like an impossibility but God has brought us here. I had a prenatal check-up yesterday and all seems well. The baby passed another fetal monitoring test and was really active. I only had one insignificant contraction, but these things can get started at the drop of a hat, so one can't really tell when the ball will get rolling here. Now we just wait and view every day as possibly being "the day".

Number 3

Last night Gracyn lost her 3rd tooth! Congratulations Gracyn! The tooth fairy made a visit last night and left 100 baht! Gracyn was very excited. Her top front teeth are beginning to loosen, so we might have a little snaggle toothed girl here soon.

Getting closer

I am about 2 days away from being full term! Woo-hoo! I am so thankful to get to this point. I have another doctors appointment tomorrow with fetal monitoring. I'm starting to notice more pre-labor signs, so we are getting there! I have to view each day as possibly being "THE DAY". I'm trying to store up as much energy as I can.

36 weeks!

I am 36 weeks along. I started my weekly prenatal visits today. I started my day with a quick ultrasound to check baby's weight. He didn't gain much since last time and came in at about 5 lbs and 9 oz. So that eased my gigantic baby worries a bit. Maybe he will hit a very respectable 7 ish lbs after all. Dr. Sankiat said everything looked really good and that if I were to go into labor now, he wouldn't do anything to stop it. Next, I was sent to Labor and Delivery to have a NST which is a non-stress test. This test is conducted for 30 minutes and measures heart rate with movement. When the baby moves you push a button. With each movement you should see a rise in heart rate. This indicates that the baby is not experiencing any stress. Our baby passed with flying colors. The NST also records any contractions that you may be having and makes a graph. I had a few Braxton Hicks (prelabor contractions) but they weren't all that strong. Being in Labor and Delivery gave me a flood of memories and some butterflies too. Both Gracyn and Aidan were born at this hospital and with Dr. Sankiat attending. All the memories of their births came back and I felt overwhelmed. It was the sights, smells, sounds and the brigade of Thai midwives swirling around me that did it. I had the " I don't think I can do this again" moment. Oh, I know it'll be fine and once you are in labor you don't have tons of time to indulge your fears as you are just trying to cope with what is happening at that moment. But, the flashbacks were really taking me back and causing me to remember that labor is difficult and it is work! The midwives were all trying to assure me that this being my 3rd child would make my labor a piece of cake. They were telling me I wouldn't need any pain relief and it would be "ngai ngai" (easy). I'll be the judge of that thank you. I will have this test weekly until the baby is born. Maybe going each week will help prepare me for the impending situation upon me. Thankfully there were not any screaming women in Labor and Delivery today! :) I know in the end when our baby is placed in our hands that I will be proud of my birth experience and overjoyed to have the baby with us. It really is a wonderful gift and the culmination of a rough 6 months. I just need to face my fears right now and pysche myself up for the inevitable. We've gone through a lot and this is just our final hurdle and the trophy is waiting! After, all this I still had to have blood drawn and then I got to treat myself to a bagel and pink lemonade at Au Bon Pain bakery in the hospital. That soothed me. Will I make it to get a bagel next week? Stay tuned!

Mr. Curls

I just have to post this pic of Aidan so that our family can see he is just as curly headed as Gracyn. Our kids have no hope of straight hair...but they are cute little mop tops!

So this is me

Ok...normally I am against putting pics of myself up on a blog...you know how women are...we scrutinize ourselves too much...but I figured I would do this for our family who may want to see at least one picture of me while pregnant. I have only 3 pictures of myself pregnant with this baby. Most days of this pregnancy were absolutely not picture worthy. I don't even like these but hey...it's all I got. I have to remind myself that I have been bed bound for 5-6 months and I have an excuse for looking less than stellar! So be kind! :)

Will this cough ever leave?

My child is coughing again. Our children have been going round and round with coughing spells since Easter. It seems we just can't get rid of this illness. Other teammates kids have also been affected by it as well. I'm feeling like I may end up getting it to. I hope not. I'm feeling a little congested and heavy in my chest, which is usually the precursor for my falling ill. I have visions of coughing my lungs up while in labor. Nightmare!!! I have just 1 1/2 weeks to go before I'm full term and 4 weeks until my due date...tomorrow leaves me at the one month exactly mark! If you are a praying person, please pray that I escape this cough. I've made it this far with out being sick. I'm so close. Trying to teach small kids to not cough all over everyone is a defeating task. Sigh.

Baby Shower

This past week my teammates gave me a baby shower/brunch! It was fun to be able to do a little socializing again after being in seclusion. All the ladies brought yummy treats to eat. They all prayed for me and for the next 1 1/2- 4 weeks...the time span that this baby could be born within. Crystal made an amazing diaper cake that was adorable and I was also given a basket of goodies such as pacifiers, bib, sleeper, burp cloth and other newborn amenities. We are getting closer and closer. It was great to be surrounded by friends.

34 weeks

I am 34 weeks along now! Yea! I had a prenatal check-up today and everything seems fine still. The Dr. can not see any visible hematoma or tearing. The baby is roughly 5 1/2 lbs now and every visit I get a "whoa" from the Dr. regarding the size. Gee thanks for the butterflies. :) The baby is also head down which was a concern since he had been laying sideways for the whole pregnancy. So I feel good that my opportunity for a c-section was reduced. Of course one still never can predict these things. But still...it was good news. I figured the baby was head down because I have been feeling different and more discomfort. I go back to the Dr. in 2 weeks and I will start having weekly fetal monitoring until the baby is born as a precaution. My doctor normally does this for all patients, but he is starting me a week earlier because of my history of high risk pregnancy. He just wants to make sure all is well and that there are no surprises. I'm thankful for the extra monitoring for peace of mind. I will also start doing all my pre-registration and testing in anticipation of the birth at the next visit as well. We really are hitting that "any day now" period of time. It is weird because I still have trouble even thinking I'm pregnant to begin with since this has been such a weird pregnancy. But, it's true and its happening!

The fun keeps coming

I haven't been downstairs in 9 days. The kids are still sick. Gracyn went back to school this past Tuesday after being sick for about 9 days herself. She was still coughing but these things can last weeks and she couldn't stay out of school that long. Aidan woke up Tuesday not looking well, so he went back to the doctor. His cough turned into to Bronchitis, which is typical for him. He is just like me in that every upper respiratory cold turns into a full blown bronchitis infection. He's been on antibiotics since Tuesday and is getting better. I may go downstairs today as hopefully the meds have had time to kill the germs. I'll be glad when the school year ends and we can hopefully be a little more stable health wise.

I've been feeling a little "off" this week myself but not sick really. I think it is just as this pregnancy continues, there are more discomforts. These are all the signals that the end is getting nearer. I'm excited but as I think about the birth I get waves of butterflies. I guess it is a classic case of the fear of the unknown, but mixed with the fear of the known too. We are excited about meeting our little guy and feel shocked that he will be here soon! We've pretty much settled his name but that shall remain a secret. My mom keeps "suggesting" the same two names. She must be stuck on those or have high hopes for those names...however...one of them is the name of her next door neighbor's dog! I told her I would not have the baby and the neighbor's dog sharing a name. She'll just have to be surprised. It's only a few more weeks.

Baby preparations and a boring Spring Break

Bless Jack's heart...he scrubbed my walls for me yesterday. He thinks I'm crazy and doesn't understand my urge to scrub walls, but he did it for me anyway. That is a good husband.

He also went food shopping today, thanks to Dana coming over to watch my kids. He made a pit stop to the department store Central to begin the initial baby needs purchases. He bought a pack of newborn diapers, some Baby Mild products to wash the baby clothes, Johnson and Johnson's Top to Toe baby bath soap, and a few other misc. things we will need. He knows I'm getting ansty. We still have more to buy but it is a start.

Gracyn helped me sort baby clothes into two piles. The first pile was for clothes we'd use immediately and the other pile for closer to 3 months along. I have them in two baskets, but now I have to get them washed and put away. So much to do...

Both kids are now sick. I thought Gracyn escaped getting any tangible sick symptoms but now she is stuffy and coughing! Grrr.... Aidan is following suit. I feel frustrated because it seems once they get over one wave of sickness, another one follows. Part of it comes from the mindset of people sending their sick kids to school because they must learn...even at the expense of others getting sick. Grrr... So, now our Spring Break is shot since the kids have been sick the whole of it. Gracyn goes back to school Tuesday. Plus, having them sick means that I have to hide out in my room to avoid getting sick myself. Grrr... Grrr...Grrr... If I weren't pregnant and hadn't had such a rough time over these last 5 months, I'd just go expose myself, get sick and have done with it...but I don't want any more misery. This too shall pass.

Tomorrow starts the Thai New Year Holiday, Song Kran. This is the big nationwide water fight. Jack bought water guns for the kids, but I don't know if they'll be able to go out a pick a fight with the neighbors this year. Hopefully the will feel better tomorrow because they have been looking forward to this. Watch the news and see if there is any mention if it in the States.

Latest news from the doctor

Yesterday I had my 32 week appointment. I'm officially 8 months along now! I feel it too. Dr. Sankiat did an ultrasound and everything is still looking good! There was still no sign of the hematoma and tear, so it really is seeming to be healed! That is such a huge relief. The baby was measuring about 4 1/2 lbs which is slightly above average for this stage of pregnancy. He thinks this baby will be larger than Aidan who was a very respectable 7 lbs at 9 days early. That freaks me out a little bit, but this baby might be early too and be average. Both Gracyn and Aidan would have been over 8 lbs if they came around their due dates...so there's really no way to tell these things. I'm just glad that the baby is gaining weight and growing since my condition can cause growth restrictions in some cases. The baby did go back to laying transverse (sideways) so we still don't know what he's going to do in regards to that. I still have time for him to turn, so I'm not going to worry about that. I did a good deal of walking at the hopsital yesterday and felt like I'd been hit by a truck by time I got home. I went straight to lay down. I was able to get my hair cut at the hospital before we left. I know that probably sounds strange but hospitals are more like resorts here and they offer all kinds of services. Mine has a salon, bookstore, Starbucks, 7-11, giftshops, drugstore, florist and 3 restaurants. These places are full service. Anyway, getting my hair cut was so nice. I hadn't been able to do that in 5 months. I needed it so badly. If you know anything about pregnancy, it makes your hair fuller and I already under normal conditions have enough hair for a few people so it was so good to get mine thinned out. Who knows when I'll be able to do that again! So now the issues aren't really what I have permission to do ( no lifting, driving or strenous activity) but more of what I have the ability to do. This will still take time. It's hard becasue my mind is working faster than my body. My nesting instict is on turbo right now but my body can't back it up. I am the classic wall scrubber and can't scrub my walls. I see things around the house that I am itching to clean and can't. I still have baby clothes to sort and wash, hospital bags to pack, baby items to buy, equipment to set up and all that sort of thing. I need to be ready to go in the next month. It's overwhelming. I know it'll all work out and if everything isn't completely in order we will survive. It's just hard when you get these overwhelming urges to work on things and you can't. In the grand scheme of things it really will be ok. Maybe Jack will scrub the walls for me.

I was able to go!

I was able to go to the team dinner last night anyway. Dave and Andrew graciously offered to take turns sitting with Gracyn so that Jack could take me over to the Mills for the Easter dinner. The food was excellent! The best part was being able to be with everyone and fellowship with the team as one for the first time in 5 months! Jack drove me over and I just parked myself on the couch. People still had to get me food and drinks, but that is a small thing. I was able to stay a little over an hour and enjoy myself.

Gracyn is still feverish...poor thing, but doesn't have any other symptoms. Hopefully, she will get over this soon. This is her Spring Break from school and isn't so far a fun way to spend it.

Tomorrow is my next doctors appt. I'm hoping for more good news and confirmation of last time's good news.

I also hope to begin posting pictures on this blog again. We just haven't really taken any. Maybe soon.

Easter Surprises

Happy Easter everyone! Today started off with Gracyn finding the Easter basket in the play room. I say THE Easter basket because Jack couldn't find two baskets. With me not being keeper of all things right now, somethings just don't get found. So we have a community Easter basket this year. Thankfully the kids don't really mind. They are just glad that there is a basket at all with chocolates in it. We made Gracyn put the basket back so that Aidan could find it too. Yeah, we are a bit lame this year. We didn't color any eggs or do much of anything this year. That has kind of been the theme of our holidays since being put on bedrest. All of our holidays/birthdays have kind of been hijacked by my situation. But anyway it gets even lamer than this. So, the kids get dressed for church. I wasn't going to be attending but Jack and the kids were. My mother sent the kids Easter clothes as she always does. Easter is her favorite holiday and you can't have Easter without the new duds. Gracyn gets decked out in a cute polka dotted dress with ribbons and bows. She looks cute and is ready to go off to church. Jack buckles the kids into their car seat and notices that Gracyn is hot. Sure enough she has a 101 fever! So they load back out of the car and Gracyn takes off her dress. She puts on PJs, takes medicine and goes to bed. Fun eh? I'm bummed too because the Mills were planning to host a team Easter potluck dinner tonight and I was going to try to go. Now, we won't be going. So this year there will be no colored eggs, no new clothes, no worship service, no Easter meal and only one basket. However, in spite of all this... He has risen...He has risen indeed! That's all I need.

I'm back...again

Ok...it's been a long time since I blogged. If you remember, Gracyn broke our new laptop back in January. We had to wait for some friends to take our laptop back to Georgia with them and have it sent off to Dell. Then, once it was repaired, we had to wait for the dad of a classmate of Gracyn's (who is from Georgia) to pick it up in Georgia and bring it back to Thailand with him after he completed a visit/buisness trip in the States! Finally, I'm read to blog again.

To catch you up...today is 136 days of bedrest. Technically, I'm only on partial bedrest now. At my last visit to the doctor, he said that he couldn't find the hematoma! Yea! He has given me permission to ease back into life outside of the bed. I'm so thankful, but it isn't as easy as just getting up and resuming life. I'm weak from 4 1/2 months of inactivity. And suddenly I'm almost 8 months pregnant! That doesn't make much of an athlete out of me. So, I'm spending most of the day in bed until 3P.M. and then I venture downstairs and spend time with the kids and eat diiner with the family. I pretty much have parked myself on the couch during that time but hey...I'm working on it! I intend to add in a little more to my day with each clearance from the doctor. I go again next Tuesday and if I am still getting the "I can't find it" bit then I'll add in a bit more activity. The baby was doing great at the last visit. He was 3 1/2 lbs and I was told he might even be bigger than my last. Apparently 3 1/2 lbs was above average for a 30 week-er. My babies have always come at 38 weeks so I'm not too concerned about having whoppers but watch this kid be late! I have only 6 weeks to go until the baby is full-term. I can't believe it. I can almost reach out and touch the finish line after all this. My next hurdle is getting the baby to go from transverse (sideways) to head down. He turned from transverse to breech at the last visit but sometimes he feels like he's gone back to sideways. We still have time to sort that out.

Well, my lunch is arriving! I better eat while hot!

Today is day 70 of bedrest or 10 weeks...which ever you prefer!!! I will see the doctor again in 9 days. I'm glad but hate the car trip because Thai roads are full of bumps and potholes. It is not exactly the best trip for someone who isn't supposed to be jostled. But you gotta do...

Yesterday, I got cable for the bedroom! Well...it's cable but not at the same time. Getting "real" cable is expensive but they have another package in which you can view the cable in the 2nd location, but both TVs in the house have to watch the same channel. So Jack and I will have to collaborate if we want to watch at the same time. But, I'm happy becasue my days were starting to get harder and harder to fill. I wake at 5:00 A.M. so that I can get help with a shower before Jack gets the kids up and also because I'm in too much pain to sleep any longer than that. By 9:00 A.M. I have had 4 hours of reading, Bible study, prayer, journaling and etc... I'm not trying to sound spiritual...it's just what I do. So from 9:00 A.M. to 9:00 P.M. I have very little to do. I stare out the window a lot but you can only do that for so long. That's a lot of time to fill. One can only nap so long as well. A nap fills about 30 minutes of my day. So, now at least I can have something else to do. I won't allow myslef to become a TV junkie, but I can now watch something in moderation. Yea!

Birthday results

Ok..so how did my b-day turn out? Did I get the fantasy or the reality? I got the reality. I woke up to eggs and toast. I also got a pretty bouquet of flowers. Rhianna brought me a nice lunch and my friend Bun bought me some perfumes. It was a collection of Calvin Klein travel perfumes. Very nice. Dinner was chicken casserole, salad and strawberry shortcake all done my way. My present was some more " big" exercise pants to fit my growing belly for my bedrest days. Think comfort, not cute. It was a good day considering. I didn't cry once about being 35!

Birthday Surprise

Yesterday the team ladies surprised me with a birthday brunch! It was really sweet. I had no idea that my downstairs was full of ladies and plans for birthday treats. They all came up singing Happy Birthday. I'm sure I looked dumbfounded..because I felt it. We had a good time of fellowship, yummy foods and played a game. It helped the day to go faster. It wasn't even my birthday yet! Thanks Ladies!

I also want to thank Helen Henry for the beautiful flowers! I can't believe you did that for me! You are so thoughtful and I can't wait to see you next month!

Milestones

On Wednesday, January 24th, I will be 35 years old! Sigh. I sigh for two reasons. 1. It's another family occassion that I will be spending in a bed. and 2. fleeting youth. I guess I've always regarded 35 as the end of youth and the beginnings of approaching middle age. I know, I know...some of my "mature" readers out there are probably shrieking with laughter at my considering 35 anything to blink at. But at any rate it feels like a milestone. I'm sure I'll have to endure another 11 months of digs from my husband who gloats over being just 11 months younger.

So as I have begun contemplating this birthday coming up, I have tried to think of how to make the day feel like a special day rather than a day to feel blue...about being in bed. I thought up my perfect bed rest birthday which I will refer to as "fantasy" and I also came up with my "reality".

The Fantasy:

• A breakfast of cheese grits casserole and hot bisquits. I have tried to get Jack to make me cheese grits casserole for about 2 months now.
• Chinese food from my favorite Chinese restaurant for lunch or dinner. I would have what we in our family refer to affectionately as "long noodles". We don't really know what they are called, but it is basically a low mein type dish with very long egg noodles stir fried with pork and onions, scallions and other veggies. Our whole family loves them. I would have the fried scallion pancakes with this dish. Delicious. I have been craving this meal for ages. What makes this a fantasy is that the restaurant, Shanghai Din Xin, is located downtown and would require 2 hrs for Jack to drive downtown to pick it up and drive back home with it. So this isn't likely to happen. I would also want a few extra orders for the fridge for other days!
• Cake and mint chocolate chip ice cream
• Presents
• Maybe a bouquet of beautiful flowers

The Reality...which is also nice given our currently lifestyle.

• A regular breakfast because after all it is a school day
• leftovers for lunch
• Chicken casserole made my way for dinner. My way is made with angel hair pasta as opposed to regular spaghetti sized noodles. It also means that the mushrooms and water chestnuts aren't diced to oblivion to make them more palatable for the mushroom and water chestnut haters in the family. If you can't taste them it really affects the overall texture and taste of the meal and ultimately the experience of it!
• A salad with tomatoes and cucumbers in it. Jack is more of a "just greens" kind of guy.
• Fresh French bread
• Strawberry shortcake with whipped cream..hmmm...come to think of it, that might be more along fantasy lines. I might prefer it to cake and ice cream.
• A present

These are my birthday thoughts. I'll have to see what I actually get that day. The best present of all? To be healed completely...and to get off this bed!!!! But even if I were healed...I couldn't find out until February 6th!!! Boo Hoo.

59 days of bedrest

So, I have been sitting for 2 months. What's it like? Here are few things that bedrest has brought to me:

• hair that hasn't seen a hair dryer in 2 months
• make up only on doctor appointment days
• 3 meals a day in bed
• crumbs all over the bed
• a sore tail bone and hips
• Thanksgiving in a hospital
• a frozen turkey in my freezer
• Aidan's birthday in my bedroom
• skipping over Jack's birthday
• seeing my Christmas tree once
• Christmas on the couch
• my team singing carols to me outside my bedroom window
• eating other people's food...yum
• missing two of Gracyn's school performances
• visting friends and team mates
• my first communion in bed...hopefully my last
• close to 20 books read
• a TV for the bedroom...thanks Mom!
• a borrowed DVD player..thanks Crystal!
• watching British sitcoms over and over and over...but still enjoying it.
• the knowledge that I really did marry the right guy
• a new understanding of suffering and a faith that has grown
• a deeper understanding of God's character
• more ultrasounds than any person should ever have
• baby kicks!
• a laptop to blog with
• a baby boy in the palm of God's hand
• a peace that passes understanding

Visitor

Last week as I was staring out my window (which I do a lot these days) I noticed a new white bird perched in a tree. This bird was huge and I'd never seen one like it before. He kept hanging around outside for about a week. I mentioned it to Jack and he said, " oh, you mean the stork?" "He's been eating all the fish in our pond." Jack didn't see the irony of the situation as quickly as I did, but I thought STORK? Are you kidding me? Here I am pregnant and a stork has been hanging outside my window! He must be trying to figure out where I live so he can make a delivery in June! :) He's gone now, but maybe God was having a little fun with me since I am couped up like a prisoner.

I'm Back!

I am officially back on-line after 2 months! We just bought a laptop to make this possible. We had a laptop, but it was stolen 2 1/2 years ago and we just saved up enough to replace it.

I had a check-up on January 9th. Yes, I'm still on bedrest. The good news is that my hematoma has shrunk from 10 cms to 5 cms! It seems to bed healing with time. It is still bigger than when this whole ordeal originally started but at least we seem to be making some progress. I haven't had any bleeding in 3 weeks. Lord willing, I won't from this point on. I'm at the half way mark in this pregnancy though which is reason for praise! God has been so good to get me to this point. Bed rest has been one of the most, if not the most, trying experiences of my life. I've been in bed for 55 days!! I may get out to shower (sitting down) and use the toilet. That's it. The pain of being confined to bed is unbelievable. I have a sore tail bone and two painful hips with shot sciatic nerves. I can only sleep 1 hour at a time before having to carefully adjust my body. I have to wait until February 6th to see the doctor again so I will be bedridden until at least then. Hopefully, I will get the all clear at that point. I'm struggling to imagine making another 3 weeks. I have a new sense of compassion for the bedridden. I can't imagine how frail old people endure this for so long.

On a lighter note, we did have a funny experience at our last appointment. I have wanted to know the sex of this baby from day 1 and Jack wanted a surprise. Had this pregnancy been "normal" I probably could have waited for Jack's benefit. However, sitting in this bed has just caused me to want to know so badly. I kept begging Jack and he wouldn't relent. So at our last appointment the doctor did a freeze frame of the baby's gender. He then asked if we wanted to know. What he forgot was that we have had more ultrasounds than any person should ever have to have and we know what we are looking at by now. Plus, this is my 3rd child. We don't need it all spelled out. So, when the doctor asked, we said, "umm...we can see it for ourselves." Jack quickly tried to cover my eyes and said, "don't look!" I said, " I saw and you saw...give it up...we both know what it is." We are having a boy! The doctor tried to cover his tracks and said "well, I don't know". I said," I can clearly see that this baby is a boy." Doctor Sankiat looked dejected and said, "what do you need me for then?" It was funny. In the end, God sided with me and let me know something that could give me a reason to smile in such an otherwise tough situation. So now during this next month I will have something to treasure up in my heart as I wait.

Please pray for me and this baby boy. The baby has been healthy this whole time and oblivious to the condition. Pray for total healing. I want to get up and enjoy this last part half of pregnancy. I want to be big and round. I want to wear something besides PJs. I want to go eat the things I crave. I want to be with my kids in their daily lives. I want to walk! I believe God works miracles and I'm waiting for mine.